We used to fight over money until I (Amy) changed my attitude. We used to hit a roadblock in our communication until we made a few changes. We used to struggle with giving each other love and respect until we started to treat each other differently. Our marriage is still not perfect, but it's a long way from where we started. I would say we are really enjoying our marriage now. What turned our marriage around? We turned around - we made a choice to give rather than take, to love rather than criticize. I don't want to sound simplistic, but we decided to behave. We decided that's not the type of marriage we want. It's too easy to say, "I'm too tired," to act selfishly, to be oversensitive and moody. But behaving badly won't get you anywhere.
Dr. Kevin Leman, in his book The Intimate Connection said, "If you really want things to turn around in your marriage, you need to begin behaving differently. There's no time like the present."
Our marriage is on the way to becoming something beautiful because we're behaving.
Truth to Ponder: Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. Romans 12:9-10 NLT
What does this verse show us about how we need to treat each other (behave)?
Discuss Together: Share with each other one area in your marriage that is going well. What would you say are the choices you made to cause that area to thrive? What would you say is one area that you are feeling stuck? Share with each other how you can personally behave differently to help turn it around?
Try This: This week do the opposite of how you tend to behave when your spouse irritates or frustrates you. (Example - Be kind rather than harsh when we have a disagreement. See how changing your behavior in that situation can change your marriage around.
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